Everything ground to a halt at the end of last year, including this blog. This blog was mainly being used to chart my journey with my health, to discuss my hobbies and to keep in touch with my friends. Well there was nothing to report on my health except for the slow gradual slide downwards as the neurologist gave up in November and we wait until I can get in to see the gynecologist February.
The hobbies stopped around the same time as the physical symptoms worsened and my mental situation deteriorated. Simply put depression settled in as all the “festivities” around increased my pain levels daily without space or time to recuperate.
It was not a fun Christmas. I was not a fun person at Christmas. There were family dramas and politics at Christmas that I wont discuss, but suffice to say, I doubt I was in a head space to play the peacemaker role I was supposed to play.
But this is my reality and as my coping skills and methods are not up the job, I need to learn new ones. One of them is to find a positive outlook or a positive spin on situations. I use humour where possible, but my brand of humour is quite snarky and self-deprecating so if I’m having an “off day” my humour can easily be misunderstood or misconstrued. I need to change my outlook and not just turn it into a joke. Jokes turn bitter too easily.
So while I’m figuring this out, there’s one change I can make. I’m going to attempt to reach out to my friends more. So for those of you who are owed an email from me, I’m sorry and I will try to catch up.
As part of this effort to reach out, I’m going to make it a goal to write on this blog every day. I doubt I will make it 365 time for the year, but I will try my best as it forces me to get out my shell and interact with people. So please keep talking to me and I’ll do my best to keep talking back 🙂 Comments and suggestions as always avidly sought after and read even if I don’t always get my responses out of my head and typed in.
But I promise I’m trying to get better at it.